My losses are just as funny as my wins in life, so I learn from em and then drop the jewels for the rest of y’all…
In my younger invincible days, I was under the impression that the females I had on the backburner were my jump offs. At no point in time did I think that I might be their “jump off”. Naïve of me to think I was more than just an emergency dick in a glass. You see women are the greatest at stroking the male ego, when the actions following can benefit them in a major way.
Let me take you back to the night, where I learned it was all a façade. I had a solid go to female for my late night “sexcapades”. She was reliable and if it’s one thing a man can’t turn his back on, it’s reliable late night inner thigh pie. She embodied all the attributes one would lust for in a jump off. No questions, eagerness to try new things, & Store 24 hours of operation.
We actually went out and shared a drink this one time. I violated the code of doing so. But she was so willing to put up with my drunk call antics, so I figured she deserved a public appearance. We drank till the bar tab was blurry. Stumbling back to her apartment was next in order. I felt so in control of everything taking place, I damn near felt like I was taking advantage of who she was. I was a goddamn winner for such a successful stress free Saturday. The lusty sex acts followed. She was glowing and I was satisfied…. I never spent the night, but this one time I was actually comfortable enough to fall asleep for a few hours… Laying there butterball naked, her house phone rang.
She looked at me and put her index finger to her lips saying “shhhhhh”…. Puzzled as shit, I looked at the clock and it was 3:37am. She picked the phone up and sat there holding a conversation that seemed to come across as her just confirming everything was cool on her end. She hung up and I went back to relaxing. I got up to go the bathroom. Upon returning to the bedroom, she was half dressed. Red flag immediately! No woman gets dressed right after a stroke session if she just had an orgasm or at least has ideas of seconds. She either wants more or you’re about to get booted out the pad like Jazzy Jeff. She started passing me my jeans and boxers, followed by these words “that was my boy, he’s in between moving right now and I usually let him sleep on my couch. He’s gonna be here in a half hour.” I squinted my eyes and said “well what does that have to do with me?” Get a blues clue Mike. You’re the appetizer to the entrée. She didn’t answer me, she just said she’ll make it up to me next time. There was no next time. My pride wouldn’t let me wander over to her crib anymore. My ego was bruised.
The craziness of the tables being turned at that very moment was damn near sickening. I got dressed and sat in my car staring out the driver side window saying to myself “Who’s really the jump off here????” Swear to everything I drove home listening to nothing but R&B with questions about how many other women in my phone had me in the same position. It’s my duty to inform you young brothas out here thinking you got the upper hand when in reality you’re just a number with obligations to be filled.
Ask yourself a couple things champ… Are you starting the conversations or ending them when it inquires sexual plans? Were you invited out to the events filled with smiles & plenty of drinks? Or you the one sending that text in hopes of a speedy positive response? You see the vagueness of how a woman responds to your wishes is the first tell of who you are to her. Women that care are super descriptive bruh. They fill that text inbox, with plenty of who’s, what, where’s & when’s. That’s where I had it all backwards. You see I was on HER schedule. Not the other way around. Never dawned on me that I never slid over her pad on my own convenience.
My sister gave me a jewel the other day. She said “Don’t think for one second that some females don’t want you to just come over, deal strokes and get out. It’s all work on the mans part. And you leave thinking you took advantage of the situation where in reality she got over.” I had to think like damn…. There’s plenty of times I just wanted to get loose with a chick but I had to wait till she confirmed all was ok. Plenty women took the vague conversation as an option and made it a major part of their game. I was actually cut off from a females roster because I was too tired to come over that night. The younger me just looked at things as her just being bitter. NO. She was replacing me like I was the 14th player on a NBA bench. You see the few females out here that don’t need emotions to connect with us are the craftiest alive. The passive aggressive ones are who really lull you into thinking you’re making decisions. You’re not a damn King to her. You’re a pawn. Like the first one that gets sacrificed in a chess match.
What can you do to prevent being a jump off? Get spontaneous with request and days you’d normally slide through to see her. If you can’t dictate that, then you already know. But I’m gonna warn you fellas who boast about having a roster full of women who let you do as you please. The odds of that actually being facts is not in your favor. You just happened to find a female who has a day and time cut out for your deeds. You’ll never see the daylight of forcing her into making a decision that doesn’t benefit her future. You’re merely the present guy at that very moment. You’re a jump off.