by • November 17, 2011 • SoPhiComments (0)2067

“The  Accidental Relationship”

 “So what would you call me if you were to introduce me to your family?”

That question is the table setter for the dinner you didn’t even know you were a guest at… So subtle, yet so telling of what’s to come. Look how far you’ve come with this one person with no intentions of anything becoming long term. You made it through the summer and the fall is about to be extinct. The Holiday season is whispering in the background. That means family events and questions about who’s coming to dinner… Are you willing to put a face to that name with everyone who’s heard about you? Life’s dating decisions and you’re bachelor freedom hang in the balance.

I’ve been there before fellas. I speak from experience and being a spectator. A lot of women look at the holiday season as the “seal the deal” time period. My aunt would always bring her new potential keeper to Thanksgiving dinners. We’d all evaluate buddy. And I’d sit there from a distant couch seat analyzing the puzzled frail smile on his face. I’d give dude the head nod like “You don’t even know where the fuck you are do you?” Yeah he was pleased to a degree, but he was confused at where he became the passenger and not the driver. I’ve been the guy in the kitchen with the aunts, uncles and parents trying to duck and dodge “future” questions.  She casually smirks, admiring how she orchestrated the whole situation. She’s a sexy villain with a plan in motion. Did you not already know that family dinners on holidays are lightweight interrogation arenas????  Sit down. Let’s try to figure out where you went left when you should’ve went right?

You were too busy wearing her thighs as ear muffs to even hear the footsteps of “The Title” walking down the hall. Oh now it’s more than just sex. Obligations are falling like rain drops from the sky. Baby showers, birthdays and wedding receptions start to creep in. You just wanted some fine cognac and a plate of food. Through the stomach is how they earn our weakness to submit.  Engagements where everyone there is a couple. Look around you… Don’t fall under the influence of the “it just happened” idea. You been her man for months. You just sent that mental email to spam is all… Women are and will remain to be the great relationship architects of the universe. The only female who isn’t thinking about her future when she lays underneath a man is a female with too many options to care. And if that’s  the case you wouldn’t be in this maze getting a tight chest from anxiety.

You’ve been coasting through dates, movie nights and late night pillow talks with not one idea in your thought process. She gave you so much freedom and respect to get comfortable with everything. It’s almost too good to be true. Coming and going as you please. Or so you thought. Little to no questioning involved…Those nostalgic moments of pure bliss are about to evaporate if you don’t pay attention.  Get wise, you really think a woman worth keeping around is gonna be comfortable with having all that casual sex and care free fun without making it a constant? Possibly adding a title perhaps… Player you were on a extended 10 day contract and she sees promise in your career. She’s thinking long term. The deal is on the table and you think this a goddamn charity game.

My college coach told me “Never give a woman something you intend to take back, because that’ll be the fight of your life.”  Fact. Women fight tooth and nail for what they desire and want. Best friends end up enemies because her girl wanted her hubby. If you’re approaching the status of being the guy at dinner, my advice would be to make a decision right now. You’re on the clock… Thanksgiving is next week. Everything you thought you had set in place for the long haul is in jeopardy. If you want the relationship, then by all means keep on trucking. But if you have plans of taking off somewhere filled with women, alcohol and “oh shit” stories for New Years without her, then you better sacrifice a lamb right now. But know this, you’re in for the fight of your life.


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