Growing up the youngest of three boys in a house where the child support checks came about as often as report cards that didn’t require an ass whooping wasn’t easy, but it’s the foundation that made Haz the man he is today. To the untrained eye Cynthia’s son may appear to just be a shit talking, kool-aid sippin, pork eating, weed smoking, hoe having ass nigga, but beneath the surface lies an individual with the potential to truly change the world.
I realized a long time ago that words were the gift I was given, the problem I’ve had since then was deciding exactly what to do with them. Should I use them for good like I want to and focus on intelligence to try and enlighten the people, or do I take the easy route and do what comes natural to entertain them by embracing my ignorance? Understanding the fact that people only like to hear certain things from certain people, I realized that it would probably take a balance of both in order to attain the attention of the masses. In other words, the way people perceive you has everything to do with the route that’s required to reach them. Perception is reality therefore Image is everything. Now as we all know, Haz Has Hoes. Definitely a gift and a curse, it just so happens that women play an integral part in my master plan. I quickly realized they would be and are the key to my success. There’s a reason why I’m always focusing on them but I’ll get to that in a minute. My initial plan is simple. First, to make it cool to be smart. There is nothing smart about being cool but unfortunately most people are in a rush to mean something to the people that mean nothing. I aim to take the focus off of ignorance and place it on intelligence by displaying that even ignorance can be intelligent. Second, to help men and women realize that we have been put at war with each other and how both sides can win. I believe that we need to re-write some of the rules that we have been given over time to not only fit the current climate but also lay the foundation for our future. Our ideas and beliefs have to evolve as we evolve if we truly hope to grow as people.
The problem is, how is a broke nigga from South Florida supposed to tell anybody anything and who would even listen? In the end I’m just a regular nigga with an opinion. Another voice in the crowd. That was until along came #SoPhi. Sophisticated Ignorance. Two words arranged in an order that described me better then I ever thought possible. A group of intelligent young brothers with an outlet. I figured it couldn’t have been anything less than fate. I always prided myself on being able to deliver my ignorance with a sense of sophistication. To be able to say something simple but dress it up with the most eloquent vocabulary and wordplay imaginable that the original thought probably never even deserved. Or to be able to say something that on the surface seems so simple yet is really layered with hidden gems for the person smart enough to uncover them. Almost everything I say has layers and a deeper meaning. Jesus spoke in parables so why should I make it easy? The first sentence of this blog is my way of telling you everything you need to know about me if you read between the lines. The youngest son from a determined single mother that worked her ass off to provide for her boys and valued education over everything. Could I really be that ratchet or could I just be giving the people what they want so they will allow me to give them what they need? Having a mother, four sisters, five nieces and a slew of aunts and female cousins could I truly have zero respect for women the way I make it seem or could I just be being hard on women because I realize the direction we are headed in and understand that they’re more valuable to reach at this point than the men. The roles have been rearranged and men have basically been conditioned to follow behind the woman’s lead nowadays and that’s why everything is in chaos. I figure if I can get the women on the right track then the men will follow because men have and will always do whatever is required to procure the pussy.
Anyway the big homie Philly blessed me with this opportunity and I began my mission by exposing my blueprint to getting women on Twitter via Crock Pot Pimpin’. I figured I should start off simple by being as honest as I could so my following would know I was genuine and most importantly real. Then I responded to Philly’s theory on Excuse Me Ma’am That Box Belongs To Me with my own theory telling the women to Keep The Coochie, I’ll Have Your Heart. Revealing mountains of game for both the men and the women that was mostly slept on I followed that up with a lesson on The Bad Bitch vs. The Homely Hoe. From there I toned it down and decided to provide the rules to “the game” with I Love This Game, and then came back with the classic that changed many hoes lives, The Single Boyfriend. Shoutout to Joe Budden. Real nigga. I continued with Good Girl Gone Bad explaining the negative effects of The Single Boyfriend all the while sticking to the original formula of sophisticated ignorance. With each blog I attempt to educate while I entertain without crossing that fine line. Parents Just Don’t Understand and The Elusive Exclusive were proof of my theory that perception is reality and image is everything because nobody really wanted to hear that from me. I get the greatest response when I talk about hoes because as far as everyone is concerned Haz = Hoes. What caught their attention in the beginning is what will continue to keep their attention. I now realize that it’s my job to bridge the gap between intelligence and ignorance to make this medicine manageable. To appease their appetite for entertainment with blogs like The Stretch Effect but still attempt to educate them at the same time while also fulfilling my obligation to inspire and inform with blogs like The Burden Of Truth. The fact is I ain’t never had shit but my brain and I struggle daily to keep myself on the right track. To be received the way I have been thus far let’s me know that there is still a place in this world for a real nigga. If I make it we make it. My plans are much bigger than any one blog post could ever describe but I am nothing without the people that I do it for. If you understand where I am coming from and see where I am going then click that link and put a fuckin dollar in the collection plate. I’m not asking for much but the cost of a dutch (and no that’s not where the money is going). If you’ve made it this far with me then I already know your priorities are in the right place. Today’s my birthday. Now show some love to a real nigga and say Happy Birthday Haz.
P.S. Major shoutout to my nigga Philly for providing me with this platform. He knew I wasn’t shit from the start and still opened the door for me. Real nigga.