#Sophi | “Are You the Right Freak?” by @ImDesi

by • June 22, 2012 • SoPhiComments (2)1996

First, I would like to give a big thank you to @PhillyTheBoss for providing me a platform to share my thoughts. I have followed SoPhi ever since I wondered what kind of “box” I have. (Ladies, Know and Rate Your “Box”) I’m grateful to be among such talented, articulate men and honestly, I was nervous as hell about my first post but I’m glad I was well received. Thank you to all the readers.

In my post last week, “When You Find the Right Freak…”, I lumped men into 3 general categories. A few men text me and asked which one they were, I saw a couple guys tweet that they were wondering which one they were, and some said I described their friends perfectly. I even had an ex ask me why I felt the need to refer to him as Mr. Perfect on Paper. Neither of the guys I described was about any specific person. But they were an example of how men are different and the same. I would even say a microcosm of humans altogether, but that’s a different post for another day. After reading people’s responses, I felt like the Right Freak was much more than that one paragraph, a little more complex and I needed to go a little deeper into who he is so that women will know when he crosses their path and men will know if they are the Right Freak.

I’m a pretty blunt, straight forward, and to the point type of person and I thought my description of The Right Freak was really accurate despite the length, but I did forget a few things. I’m gonna try my best to speak in general terms and not describe the right freak for me because that would just be an Alpha male and there are a few Right freaks who aren’t. In a nutshell, The Right Freak is a man who has mastered balancing the highs and lows of life as well as his own personal flaws and strong points. To the many men who felt that they are a mix between Mr. Perfect on Paper and Mr. He Cool, But, that’s a good thing, you’re on the right track! What sets The Right Freak apart from the other two is that he has realized his potential and is working to live it. Mr. Perfect on Paper is stuck in the “get a job, get married, raise a family, and then you die” mindset and Mr. He Cool, But is stuck in the “YOLO and being broke is all I know” mindset. The Right Freak is a man living to be legendary, not for the money, not for the fame, but because he so deeply desires to die knowing he did extraordinary things while here. The intangible riches of life are most important to him, material items are for play. He is a master at manifesting and knows to get it all, you have to first want it all.

The Right Freak is the epitome of strength. He is ever evolving and done working through all the misfortunes, dramas, and mistakes of his past. He has learned many lessons about life, often times the hard way, and is now focused on doing what he can to create a better future. My friend Rhyan reminded me about a very important characteristic. Unless you’re an Atheist, The Right Freak has some kind of faith system. Religion, spirituality, or whatever you want to label it as, he has a set of beliefs that he stands firm in which guide his decisions. But just as The Right Freak is strong, he is also weak. He is vulnerable, insecure, unsure, and very afraid at times. Afraid to reveal his soul to you and afraid to trust that you will commit to loving him just as much as he does you. His fears may cause him to sometimes seem cold or distant only because he’s going back and forth in his mind wondering if you’re worth it. Wondering if he is ready for all of the responsibilities that come with the territory of living a legendary life with love in the mix. And those are the times when he’ll need you to show up most. Those are the times when you’ll be better off giving him his space and trusting that it’s a storm you are better off just waiting out but at the same time letting him know you’re available if he needs you. When he is low, aim to stay high so you can balance him out.

Balance is key. The Right Freak’s imperfections make him perfect because they’re not ignored, they’re a work in progress. I have only listed a few examples of the many possibilities of characteristics and bumps in the road.  If and when you find The Right Freak, which will of course only be after you become The Right Freak, be willing to work with him by only doing what stimulates growth in him and you. It’s a process. Growing together is what will keep you together.




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2 Responses to #Sophi | “Are You the Right Freak?” by @ImDesi

  1. Sheen Bean says:

    Another impeccable post! I like the way you emphasize the importance of balance in a relationship. There’s nothing wrong with being a work in progress.

  2. Desi says:

    thank you!! Glad you enjoyed them!!

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